Losing It

uterogrative (yü-tə-rä-gə-tiv\) :

1. the exclusive responsibility exercised by virtue of the named reproductive organs to plan and execute a wedding
2. WIC bullsh*t
3. man's reason for excusing himself from the bulk of the wedding planning responsibilities


I just made that bad boy up. That's right. That's how much time I have on my hands as I continue not to make important decisions about our wedding.

Without realizing it, I think J thought I had some sort of natural ability, natural knowledge (something like maternal instincts - matrimonial instincts, if you will) to plan this shebang. Well guess what? I don't. Even after reading countless blogs and speaking with my friend who recently went through the planning, I don't feel much wiser.

In fact, I feel frustrated. It's not like they have a manual for this sort of thing (blog porn aside). At least not a helpful manual. I mean, how can you teach someone how to choose a venue with just enough class without straying from your DIY aesthetic? Or how to walk that fine line on photography - choosing a photograph in your budget while simultaneously facing the risk of living with photographs for the rest of our lives of posey shots with no artistic flair? I don't think you can.

So I tell J this, but it's not like he's tucked away the manual for the right time to share it with me. No, he's just as clueless as I am - and I'd venture to say more so. So what do we do?

I want to get married soon. Absolutely 2011, even as early as March. That's not gonna happen because of conflicting family and friend schedules, which is okay because it fives me more time to plan. But then I worry about sacrificing our own desires for those of others. That's a whole other post, though.

So if any of you can offer some advice on how you deal/dealt with the intimidation of planning a party so big and important that you need to spend $2000+ on photography for it, that'd be a great first step.